An American Big Guy in Liverpoo

The journey, is, as always, the destination, but sometimes you genuinely have to wonder if the WWE has a calendar during writer’s meetings. Right? NO! (Sorry, Andy). Yes, last night’s episode was the second-to-last one before the fourth fifth sixth biggest “PPV” of the year, and, yes, there’s only three matches booked for the show. But it’s was also one of only four weeks between Hell in a Cell and Survivor Series, the last three of which have directly related to the show in question: the first one (The Pride is [Ry]back) established the conflict, the second one (Business Decisions) raised the stakes and the third one gave us the ‘fun’ team building parts of a movie everyone loves. And while SOME PEOPLE (which is our new word at Raw Regurgitated for every poor sap who writes one of these things other than your correspondent) may think that this was “rushed” or “made no sense”, it makes you wonder if they were even paying attention or simply just mad that they didn’t get what they want, like so much Sepinwall. The Big Show hates the Authority, and pretty much always has, not to mention Henry, Sheamus and Cena haven’t feuded IN YEARS, while he and Rusev are currently in one and Ryback, well, Ryback is just the best and can do whatever the hell he wants. It’s unclear why the WWE should be required to show a lower third explaining why each member has decided to join Team Cena.

Along these same lines, it’s easy to forget that the “traditional” Survivor Series elimination match currently booked involves the biggest star in the company (Cena), the Intercontinental Champion (Ziggler), the US Champion (Rusev), the person he took the title from (Sheamus), the biggest mid-card feud on the show (Show and Henry), the top heel (Rollins), likely Raw Regurgitated’s favorite wrestler (RYBACK), definitely the WWE’s their best monster (Luke Harper) making his (triumphant) return and … Kane. That knocks out AT LEAST three potential matches — Sheamus-Rusev, Show-Henry, Cena-Rollins — that would be used to sell the PPV at this point, and would likely filled out if not the entirety of the card, at least the overwhelming majority of it. Instead, despite a depleted roster, they’ve managed to include a title match — albeit for the Diva’s title, though, given the performers, this match will be somewhere between competent and highly entertaining — and a quasi-main event in Ambrose-Wyatt. They will also likely have an insane multi-team tag title match — involving as many as 20 performers, if they decide to go with the “if your partner is eliminated, so are you” gimmick they used during the first two Survivor Series — along with some sort of Divas clusterkerfuffle. Is it an ideal show? Probably not. But the Survivor Series has literally never been about what’s ideal, it’s about destroying your competition and goosing ticket sales. Just ask Jim Crockett Promotions.

Raw Regurgitated’s Most Important Fan Reaction of the Night presented by MTN DEW Kickstart: Either we’ve moved past the “Goldberg” chants for Ryback, or most wrestling fans in England are both impossible to understand and terrible people.

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