Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

Of all of the reasons to want to watch Raw live that don’t include “hate working retail” or “not post Raw Regurgitated at 5 in the afternoon”, “being the first to tweet a #KofiKingston joke during that opening” tops the list.

Randy Orton has been in or around THIS BUSINESS for his entire life, absorbing knowledge from some of the great workers and storytellers in history. From Roddy Piper to Andre the Giant, he learned from the best the industry has ever seen. And not a single one taught him how to speak into a microphone without sounding like a complete idiot. It’s remarkable.

The switch from selling Daniel Bryan as an extremely talented, if generic face to The Face of the Company in terms of announcer rhetoric, branding and “staying on message” should make everyone wonder why Vince doesn’t run Linda’s campaigns. At this point, the WWE brain trust seems like it could get Castro over with a crowd in Miami.

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