Not since The Biggest Party of the Summer, have we done something so fun (and perhaps legally irresponsible, so be responsible playing this game, because dead readers are worthless to our Google AdSense account.)

But, in honor of the Most Exciting 60 Minutes of the Year, we’re bringing back the OFFICIAL Juice Make Sugar PPV drinking game as well as teasing our BEAUTIFUL new logo (created by our friend DJ) which will you see going up all over the place in the coming days and weeks.

A few quick notes:

• Seriously, don’t die or drive or anything stupid, we can’t afford your family suing us because you eliminated yourself from the Rumble (of life) 
• Instead of writing “every time there’s a”, it (or the context-appropriate phrasing) should be implied at the beginning of each rule.
• Anything in quotes can be paraphrased, but should maintain the basic integrity of the sentence.
• Sips = approximately 1 second.
• Don’t forget to check out our What’s the Worst That Could Happen? preview, the PPV Predictions episode of Headlock’d and Angry Andy’s thoughts on the show
  

Other than that, have fun (responsibly):

Sips

1 sip:

“WWE Universe”

“Most Exciting 60 Minutes of the year”

“Trending on Twitter”/”Twitter”

“WWE App”

“Total Divas”

“Maggle” or variant from JBL

Every inappropriate Jerry Lawler joke (Editor’s Note: PLEASE use discretion)

Obscure reference to a old school wrestler by JBL

“This is a FIGHT”/ “They came here to fight!”

“WWE Network/Biggest thing in the history of industry/revolutionary”

“Road to WrestleMania”

“Anything can happen at the Royal Rumble”

Every single elimination

“The Animal”

“cracks in the Shield”

3 sips:

Every elimination of more than one person at a time

“The face of the WWE”

Brad Maddox appearance

Kane appearance

“Buzzards”

5 sips:

Kofi Kingston save from elimination

Any announcers joining the Rumble

“OHHHHH MYYYY”

Kane and Brad Maddox appear together

Surprise entrant working full-time schedule (Sheamus/Christian/Daniel Bryan)

Roman Reigns spear

Announcers say how much the crowd is behind Daniel Bryan

“Beast Incarnate” or “Giant” said during match Brock Lesnar/Big Show match

Someone kicks out of a finisher

Vickie Guerrero appearance

JBL referring to “conspiracy theories” (5 sips for initial reference, and one sip added for each conspiracy he references)

“This is awesome” chant

Chug (10-second)

Surprise Rumble entrant not currently working full-time schedule  (Sheamus/Christian/Daniel Bryan)

“big fight feel”

“Vintage” – Michael Cole

“New champ!” – Michael Cole

Oddly clever retort to JBL’s Fox News-level conservative talking point from Michael Cole

Blood – Busted open hardway

Cut-away to celebrities in the crowd (chug for each segment, not celebrities)

Surprise match

Cross-references to the “over-the-top” distribution of the WWE Network and “over-the-top” eliminations

Shotgun

Triple H screws someone

F-5 or Go 2 Sleep (Editor’s note: you will be dead after this.)

Title change

Blood – From blading