The Suicide Dive Squad

Hey, Summer Rae! Nice to see you put on your “I actually know how to wrestle” boots on today. They look great on you.
What, RVD, couldn’t find someone to airbrush your tuxedo?

The one good thing to come out of Roman Reigns being out for the last three months is that he’s clearly making good use of those acting lessons the WWE has him taking. He isn’t exactly Lawrence Olivier, but being able to speak clearly and articulately while also working within the context of the crowd reaction — listening to what they have to say and reacting to that instead of trying to just getting through what needs to be said — is perhaps the most important skill for someone who will be working at his level to understand.
 Though, seriously, never again with pants like that:

This John Cena-Big Show match was fundamentally meaningless, but it was a match that happened and nothing bad happened, nobody messed up the work too bad and the crowd didn’t seem to hate it. And while it may feel like they are doing these finishes every other week, that’s only because — for better or worse — this upcoming “PPV” is just an addendum onto the last PPV which happened THREE FUCKING WEEKS AGO. But even with this truncated schedule, the company has done a bang-up job building up a unique PPV card with some geniunely intriguing match-ups.

However, why they chose to sell said “PPV” with a go-home show that focused almost completely on things that happened before the build up to the show is exactly the type of thing that the WWE should avoid. Why exactly the Slammy Awards couldn’t have waited until next week — considering this is a fundamentally meaningless “PPV”, all things considered and it’s hard to imagine the Slammy Awards with no exciting or interesting guests booked for the show outside of the always wonderful Seth Green (who, outside of Hugh Jackman is the best possible special guest host) goosing much of a ratings pop — when Brock Lesnar would be on the show and they wouldn’t have to work about fitting ten pounds of shit in a three-pound/hour bag.

At least it ended with the not-at-all foreshadowy “heels look strong for a PPV” trope, so we won’t be able to predict what happens on Sunday!

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