The Big Guy Strikes Again

In the history of wrestling, the best case scenario for a contract signing was Andre threatening to kick Hogan’s ass. These things are, without fail, so contentious that they have literally never ended in anything other than fisticuffs. So, given this, at what point is there going to be a commissioner who just  says “no more contract signings or, better yet, just gets rid of the table they are going to sign the contract on? Like bullet control, getting rid of tables in this equation would reduce superstar-on-superstar violence astronomically.

The Cesaro Troll Job, as it will henceforth be known, is maybe the single most heelish thing anyone has done since Randy Orton kissed an unconscious Stephanie while HH was handcuffed just out of arms reach. It may not seem like much, but not only did Cesaro endear himself to/throw himself in with the bad guys, he’s also done in a way that doesn’t directly benefit him nor one that he has any real control over. Which means he quite literally was a dick just because he felt like.

And while that may sound like, well, pretty much every cool heel ever, this was done in a way that ever inoculated him against “cool heel” pops by pissing off not just the type of fans who are actively rooting for Team Cena to prevail in this storyline, but those who wanted to see him join the Authority just so he’d be invited to the 10-way dance. He was a ick to everyone, except for his bosses, for whom he did something just to make them laugh. And there’s  nobody on earth more unlikable than the court jester, especially when he can kick the good guy’s ass.

Note well — if you are going to try to figure out which member of a group is going to betray the others,  It’s always the (big) guy with the custom made weight belt.

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