HHH announces the Evolution vs. The Shield match for Extreme Rules in the first segment on the show.
For anyone who has ever watched wrestling ever, that they started off the show this way should come as no surprise. Can anyone even remember the last time a show didn’t begin with HHH?
Big E b Alberto Del Rio via DQ
While this match isn’t a concern — given del Rio ability and prestige in the company as a multi-time world champion — they better start giving Big E. dominant wins over guys at del Rio’s basic “level” if they don’t want it to feel like a march toward impending doom at Extreme Rules against Cesaro whoever wins the IC No. 1 Contender’s tournament. Otherwise, if he wins it feels like it won’t feel like anything other than them telling viewers “we decide who wins, this isn’t a real sport.”
Paul Heyman does a promo, mostly talking about Brock Lesnar. He goes on and on about Lesnar being the conqueror of the streak. He got great heat and apparently this was a great promo.
Getting to see Paul Heyman be Paul Heyman is worth the price of admission. As we’ve said before, he’s become a modern-day Bobby Heenan by dictating things with the show instead of just reacting to them. Brock beating Taker was Heenan getting Andre to rip the crucifix, and the Heyman Family is just hitting its Rick Rude/Brain Busters stride.
Paige b Aksana with the scorpion cross lock
Step 1: Have Paige work all the way up the ladder by having her become slightly more competent in every match.
Step 2:
Step 3: Profit
Torito b Hornswoggle. Match was entertaining, Torito very talented.
This seems like the type of stuff that makes comedy tag teams and gimmicks worth it. Fun matches by solid performers that are transcend their status as “the worst people on the show.” It’s like Slobs vs. Snobs, except it’s all Slobs and everybody is a Tri-Lamb.
Alexander Rusev b R-Truth with the accolade. Xavier Woods tried to protect R-Truth after the match but he got squashed as well.
RUSEV! CRUSH!
Santino Marella b Fandango while he was distracted by Emma and Layla going at it. Emma and Santino celebrated after the match.
I like everyone involved, but can’t imagine this being anything more than “not so awkward I want to fast forward and rinse my mouth out with soap.”
Batista b Sheamus clean with the Batista bomb.
This could mean Sheamus will be the fourth member of Evolution, but that seems very unlikely. It could also, much more likely mean that they just feeding guys they’ve made unstoppable to members of Evolution so they can look extra cool when they lose to The Shield (we assume.) Either way is fine, just have it end with “make the Shield famous wrestlers” to the best of their abilities.
SKIM this show.
While certain parts of this show will be totally worth watching — definitely the Heyman promo, probably Torito/Hornswoggle and Sheamus/Batista, maybe LANA! and Rusev — most of the rest is either “things we already knew” or “things we don’t really care about”.
